hemmed and hawed until brian asked me what I thought of this trip I said the "vibes were off" in the beginning, though I did also bring up maman on sunday (end of the trip) as an example. him scrolling [reels] on his phone after he had finished eating. yes, he did put his phone down and engage when I started serving him softballs (what's a harder trip, A vs B) he asked for "actionables" and I said there were none. I think we do approach problems similarly — if there's no "ask" for the other person to change, there's no impetus to bring it up. but I do think back to the principle, one I do not follow, of bringing things up when they bother you, even if they're small. of course, there needs to be a threshold, which I am struggling to find. ultimately, I did not say this explicitly, but I said everything around it: even though there is nothing I want him to change, I want him to know that I felt unhappy. because if we break up in the future w...
now that I live in an apartment where I don't have to share a kitchen (and bathroom) and curtail my time in it, how have my cooking (and grooming) habits changed? now that I can spend my hours outside of work freely in my apartment (e.g, stay up late working, binge watch shows), how have they changed? without social obligations or anyone to judge me or hold me accountable for my social life, how has my social life changed? with new freedoms, how do I choose to spend my time? are there new factors that influence my life now? with these changes, am I living a life more true to myself?
the pacing and writing style were engaging. the rhythm, the cadence of dialogue without quotations melding into exposition. the story wove back and forth in time, constantly. it was really a series of scenes. at the beginning of each chapter we would jump forward a few months, but when the scene was over, we would skip backward a few days or weeks to a moment that related to the opening scene we just finished. it was hard to follow exactly the chronology, but that also didn't matter very much. to be blunt, the plot was mediocre. it was a story about lovers, almost a love story. it could have been written very different, with the same plot, and been a love story. but as it was, it was more a "character study" I suppose. sometimes there were scenes or passages dropped in that weren't super relevant, but revealed an interesting perspective or observation from the author. surprisingly, I enjoyed them, and didn't find them too preachy. I enjoyed the vignettes through ...
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